As I’ve been saying for months now, I plan on Election Day to do what I’ve done since 1992: vote for an independent Presidential candidate — possibly a write-in vote. (Evan McMullin seems like a good guy but he’s basically a bald George Bush.) I could explain to you why I’m doing this — but it turns out that people already know!

For instance, Roger Simon knows that I’m refusing to vote for Trump out of “self-regard,” because I “want to have ‘clean hands,’” and because I have “professional media affiliations and/or public profiles [I wish] to protect.”

Meanwhile, my friend John Stackhouse knows that I’m refusing to vote for Hillary because I want to “maintain [my] purity” and “protect [my] virtue”; moreover, I believe that the election is “about [me] and [my] self-esteem.”

So since everyone already knows that my decision is driven not by rational political judgment but by profound character flaws, there wouldn’t be much point in my trying to give my own account, would there?